wardrobe malfunction
so like,
I took the kiddoes trick er treatin tonight. After a while we headed back home and I thought it'd be fun to pull a creepy skeleton robe-wearin dude off our porch, put it on and walk the neighborhood 8 foot tall with red glowing eyes. This has always been an outdoor prop and we keep it in the shed the rest of the year.
I made it to destination number one kind of itchy with responses like "eeeww!" and "duuuuude!" I expected as much. I looked awesome.
Destination number two was dark and I chated a while, again, tickly and itchy. The skeliton dude is kind of hairy. Wigs itch. Part of the gig, I guess.
When I cruised back towards home, my wife saw me and freaked, informing me I was crawling with spiders galore. I looked up into the head of my new awesome costume and saw more dang spiders than I've ever seen and they were swarming like an ant bed gettin' kicked. One of em I am pretty sure was all pointin' and laughin' at me. 12 of em pounced just cuz I jumped.
So now big skeliton guy is all crazy in the yard "bwaaaa!!!!!!!" kids all scattering... "AAAAHHHHHHHH" parents all mad... "bwaaaa haahaaaaa son of a bwaaaa!!!"
I then stripped right there in the front yard right down to my undies... which had teddy bears on em sayin "I love you beary much." Still, I continued "bwaaaaaHHHHH!!!!" Now moms are grabbin' their kids and running. I did a stop drop and roll like a half naked on fire guy... or at least like a middle aged man that just wore a spider nest helmet.
Man, I have more free candy than I know what to do with.
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31 Oct 2009, 06:03 pm
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