LMAO funny news story

[ford_racer]

This was in the Calgary Sun .. the title of the

article was "Best Comeback Line Ever."

In summary, the police arrested Ward Branham, a
22-year-old white male, resident of Lethbridge,
Alberta, in a pumpkin patch at 11:30p.m. on Friday.

Ward will be charged with lewd and lascivious
behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication
at the Calgary courthouse on Monday.

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin
patch he decided to stop.

"You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and
there was no one around there for miles. At least I
thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview.


Ward went on to say that he pulled over to the side of
the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was
appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and
proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need." I guess I was
just really into it, you know?" he commented with
evident embarrassment.

In the process, Ward apparently failed to notice a
police car approaching and was unaware of his audience
until Officer Brin Taylor approached him. "It was an
unusual situation, that's for sure," said Officer
Taylor. "I walked up to (Ward) and he's...just working
away at this pumpkin."

Taylor went on to describe what happened when SHE
approached Ward.

"I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you
realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?"

He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was
there, and then looked me straight in the face and
said, ... "A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"





Here is the gizoogle version:

This was in tha Calgary Sun .. tha title of the

article was "Best Comeback Line Playa summary, tha po-po arrested Ward Branham, a
22-year-old white male, resident of Lethbridge,
Albizzles in a pumpkin patch at 11:30p.m. on Friday.

Ward will be charged wit lewd n lascivious
bizzle public indecency, n public intoxicizzle tha Calgary courthizouse on Monday.

The suspect explained thizzat as he was pass'n a pumpkin
patch he decided ta stop."You know, a pumpkin is soft n squishy inside, and
there was no one around there fo` miles. At least I
thought there wasnt," he stated in a phone interview.


Ward wizzle on ta say thizzat he pulled over ta tha side of
the road, picked out a pumpkin tizzle he fiznelt was
appropriate ta his purposes, cut a hole in it, and
proceeded ta satisfy his alleged "need." I guess I was
just really into it, you know?" he commented wit
evident embarrizzles tha Calgary courthizouse on Monday.

The suspect explained tizzy as he was bustin' a pumpkin
patch he decided ta stizzop.In tha process, ward apparently failed ta notice a
police ride approach'n n was unaware of his audizzles offica B-R-to-tha-izzin taylor approached him . They call me tha black folks president. "it was an
unusual situation, thats fo shizzay said officizzles hittin that booty. "i walked up ta (ward) n hes...just working
away at this pumpkin."

tizzles wizzy on ta describe what happened wizzle she
approached ward.

"i J-to-tha-izzust wizzy up n said, "excuse me siznir, but do you
realize that you is straight trippin' a pumpkin?"

he froze n was clearly very surprised that i was
there, n then looked me straight in tha face and
said, ... "a pumpkin? damn...is it midnight alreadizzles

[Memphis]

good post that second version is even funnier

[v_dub_ya]

[robz95xj]

[ford_racer]

nice red x's rob, you dildo sucker

[robz95xj]

Originally Posted by ford_racer

nice red x's rob, you dildo sucker

works fine for me Mr Dial up

[bmxer99]

Part 3


American Pie 4

The Pumpkin Pie!!!